Martin Buber, I-Thou

Do we value each other?

“Love is responsibility of an I for a You: in this consists what cannot consist in any feeling - the equality of all lovers.”

― Martin Buber, I and Thou

“Spirit is not in the I but between I and You.”

― Martin Buber, I and Thou

"With the “you,” it is a relation between my whole being and an other recognized as a person, not an object."- An interpretation.

At the core of "I and Thou" is Buber's distinction between two primary modes of engaging with the world: the "I-Thou" and the "I-It" relationships. In an "I-Thou" relationship, a person encounters another being and unique entity, engaging with them in a way that acknowledges their full humanity and seeks genuine connection. This mode of relation is characterized by mutuality, presence, and a sense of encounter and mystery. It involves a deep recognition of the other's inherent value and a willingness to engage in a relationship that transcends instrumental or practical purposes.

The I-Thou relationship allows for intimacy, love, and respect for the other person.

An "I-It" relationship occurs when a person interacts with the world in a detached, objectifying manner, treating others as mere objects or instruments for their purposes. In this mode, the other is not genuinely encountered as a unique individual but as something to be analyzed, categorized, or used.

Within the I-It context, another person is viewed as nothing more than a "thing." In war, enemy soldiers are easily considered as "it." Not all soldiers think in this way, but for those who do, it becomes easy to kill the enemy without experiencing guilt, trauma, or a sense of regret. During World War 1, it was common for the two opposing sides to leave their trenches and visit each other on Christmas and exchange cigarettes or other items. When the brief Christmas evening ended, they would return to their trenches and resume fighting the next day. 

Another example of I-It relating is walking past a homeless person lying on the sidewalk indifferently. That happens too often. It's as if the homeless person is just a throwaway to the passerby.

Buber emphasizes the significance of the "I-Thou" encounter in experiencing authentic existence and connecting with the deeper aspects of reality. He argues that genuine dialogue and relationship with others and the world are crucial for human fulfillment and meaningful existence.

Tragically, this needs to be more frequent in today's world.

"I and Thou" have been influential in philosophy and psychology, theology, and various fields concerned with human relationships and the nature of human existence. Buber's ideas have inspired many to reflect on the quality of their interactions with others and seek more profound, authentic forms of engagement.

In addition, Buber's distinction between "I-Thou" and "I-It" relationships has been influential in psychology, particularly in developing person-centered approaches to therapy. Psychologist Carl Rogers, for example, drew on Buber's ideas when planning his concept of "unconditional positive regard," which emphasizes the importance of recognizing the full personhood of the individual in therapeutic interactions.

Buber's work has been a source of inspiration for literary and artistic endeavors. His emphasis on the significance of genuine encounters and dialogue has resonated with writers, poets, and artists who seek to convey the complexities of human relationships and the richness of human experience.

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